blog blog blog

Here's to one of those horrifically long posts.

All in a bunch of random notes.


2006 is almost gone, and soon 2007 will be here (or is already here, depending on which part of the world you are in and when you are reading this). Time flies so fast when you least expect it to, and soon i'll finish my degree and graduate. Can't wait for that day to come. In May. But in the meantime theres this small matter of 4 final papers in 2 weeks time. And 3 final papers in May. And a final year project to top it all up.

Study study study baby yeah!

Walawe 4 papers in 5 days is just too much.

--------------------------------------------
I been spending the last month (ie dec) using up my antisocial quota that was unfinished. Isolation from the world for a short period of time is good for you soul, i tell you. Not too long though. Although i did venture out occasionally to get supplies and that single christmas dinner, i've been pretty much living in quarantine. And doing a lot of thinking. Which often happens only when i'm depressed. And the depressing thing about this depression is that i don't know why i'm depressed. As a science/math trained student, the worst case scenario to solving a problem is not knowing what the problem is. But nonetheless i'll continue to search for the reason of this depression, and hopefully, while i'm at it, forget about this depression in the first place.
---------------------------------------------
Over my quarantine month i came to the realization about how fragile humans are. And how grievous knowledge can be. People nowadays glorify the human will so much, eg, "When there's a will, there's a way so they say." And if you don't make it you're classified as having a weak will. Weakling. Someone who cannot go far. Get out of my sight, u weakling! Let's place the strong willed guy on the pedestal instead and write books about his life and how they made it big. When in truth is, all of us are so prone to failure, our fears, so many things beyond our control, death, tragedy etc. You wake up in the morning and determine in your heart to not do this and not do that, and do this right etc, and by night you've gone against everything that you willed for in the morning. So much for the strength of the human will - though i'm not implying that we should go on living without a purpose or will and drift about aimlessly, just that we overglorify the "human will" element.

And i also realized that the more you know, the more you know you don't know, the more you are unable to do, the more things are beyond your control. The more you care, the more you are unable to care; etc. The list goes on. So comes the saying ignorance is bliss. But to be ignorant is to live like a fool. A happy fool maybe. But i consider ignorance an act of selfishness. Because you have to capacity to bring about changes for the better, but you choose to ignore it. But yet to know is to be grieved, and to fight a never ending battle that you will never win. Pretty bleak outlook on life huh?
--------------------------------------------------
I just realized i've used up my "but" quota for 2007 in the last 2 sentences.
hmmm
------------------------------------------------
On to more trivial matters, I don't usually make new year resolutions, but nonetheless i did come up with a few when i was up last night lying on my bed at 3am fighting off the effects of caffein.

Anyways here are a few of them.

1. Swear off anime and computer games until i graduate.
Possibility of success: Confirm fail.

2. Learn every single song in GnR's Appetite for Destruction album.
Possibility of success: Achievable if i don't get bored of it.
In short, highly unlikely. 50% is good enough.

3. Get my biological clock back in order.
Possiblity of success: Must be done in order to wake up in time for exams.

4. Learn to sing and not sound like cinapek.
Possibility of success: Quite hard because i cannot tahan my own singing.

5. Play Steve Vai's "Tender Surrender"
Possibility of success: 0%. But still worth a shot.

6. Do some excercise. Nahhhh.
---------------------------------------------------
You know you got some serious colour issues when your brown underwear comes out from the washing machine blue in colour.
---------------------------------------------------
Hard Gay Ramen!
HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
---------------------------------------------------
I'm deciding whether or not to give this long hair thing one last try or to just cut it short. Decisions decisions.
Any suggestions???
---------------------------------------------------
i received a friendster testimonial from Joannah the other day stating she heard my x-rated recording of Eric Clapton's Layla Unplugged. Why Enoch WAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIII????
--------------------------------------------------
It's 230pm, new year's eve, and time to study.

Happy new year folks!!